I've been listening to this song and it gets me to a place. A place I couldn't simply figure out. This song deserves my respect. To feel the way the writer feels, its an explicit thing to happen. There are moments that truly exist where you love so selflessly, you'd do everything just to let him know and believe how much that love is. Where you are in awe of how much that love could offer. And enchanted to see that something like this could exist.
Its been months when I last saw him. And I admit there are those times where I pretend that the breakup didn't hapen. Where I still have the right to dream and plan for a future with him. But I have to snap out of fantasies and bring myself back to reality.
One of the daydreams I drown myself in a lazy afternoon is the part where I visualize the shape of his face, how deep his brown eyes felt and how warm his hugs are. The memories we shared in the velvety sunset by the beach, where I still memorizes his giggles and his kisses. Those times where id do my best to let him know that I exist to love him.
I've been offered for new love a couple of times. I've been encouraged to open my doors again. And everytime, I refuse. Without letting them know the real reason behind. I'm afraid they will despise me, hearing me say, I know I couldn't love the same way I did to him. I have the greatest fear of giving false hugs, false smiles, false compliments and false affection. I'm afraid I might not be able to give my whole towards a person who deserves better. I wouldn't risk anything bound to be beautiful and turn it into another heartbreak.
When I love again, I would love again with an empty heart. Ready to be filled once more.
If I had the chance to write him a letter, I would send him this:
Dear Fred,
Hi, its been months since I last saw you, its great to hear little pieces of information about you. It seems like you are finally about to live your dream. I, too is starting a journey. Its weird that i remember when we last talked about dreams, we use to have parallel ones, something that both of us are included. But, I guess fate has its way of saying, some dreams are not meant to be fulfilled.
Honestly, I'm still in the state of asking myself, how long will I still love you? I've never seen you for so long but my prayers are still with you. But I know I am obliged to lose this, I have to, I must. I no longer have your love and I do not know if this is something we are still bound to have.
I just wanted you to know how much joy you have given me. A joy that makes me wanted to be a better person. Please take care of yourself. The next time we will see each other, we will be two very different people. But we are two better individuals, grateful to have you in my memories. I love you.
Friend,
Ena
Its been months when I last saw him. And I admit there are those times where I pretend that the breakup didn't hapen. Where I still have the right to dream and plan for a future with him. But I have to snap out of fantasies and bring myself back to reality.
One of the daydreams I drown myself in a lazy afternoon is the part where I visualize the shape of his face, how deep his brown eyes felt and how warm his hugs are. The memories we shared in the velvety sunset by the beach, where I still memorizes his giggles and his kisses. Those times where id do my best to let him know that I exist to love him.
I've been offered for new love a couple of times. I've been encouraged to open my doors again. And everytime, I refuse. Without letting them know the real reason behind. I'm afraid they will despise me, hearing me say, I know I couldn't love the same way I did to him. I have the greatest fear of giving false hugs, false smiles, false compliments and false affection. I'm afraid I might not be able to give my whole towards a person who deserves better. I wouldn't risk anything bound to be beautiful and turn it into another heartbreak.
When I love again, I would love again with an empty heart. Ready to be filled once more.
If I had the chance to write him a letter, I would send him this:
Dear Fred,
Hi, its been months since I last saw you, its great to hear little pieces of information about you. It seems like you are finally about to live your dream. I, too is starting a journey. Its weird that i remember when we last talked about dreams, we use to have parallel ones, something that both of us are included. But, I guess fate has its way of saying, some dreams are not meant to be fulfilled.
Honestly, I'm still in the state of asking myself, how long will I still love you? I've never seen you for so long but my prayers are still with you. But I know I am obliged to lose this, I have to, I must. I no longer have your love and I do not know if this is something we are still bound to have.
I just wanted you to know how much joy you have given me. A joy that makes me wanted to be a better person. Please take care of yourself. The next time we will see each other, we will be two very different people. But we are two better individuals, grateful to have you in my memories. I love you.
Friend,
Ena
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